"I recently traveled to a beach town to visit relatives. I’m there so often quite a few people think I’m a local. Both locals and tourists are pretty good at respecting personal space and won’t sit right next to for in front/behind you. In my 20+ years of making multiple visits per year I have never had a problem with tourists...until my most recent visit.

I get to the beach early, like at 8:30 am, and I set up my chair and umbrella. There are maybe 5 other families already set up for the day, so there’s no one within a 100-foot radius of me. For the next hour and a half I’m blissfully enjoying an audiobook, and a handful of other people show up. The entire beach is still empty. All of a sudden I feel a tap on my shoulder, thinking it was my relatives deciding to join me. Nope.

It was an incredibly obese, trashy-looking woman, in her late thirties/early forties, standing over me. Behind her was about 12 other people who appeared to have packed up their entire house and were lugging in through the sand. She’s EP.

EP: 'Excuse me but you’re in our spot.'

Me: 'What spot?'

EP: 'This is our spot. My family is staying at the hotel over there and we’ve been sitting in this spot for the last four days. You need to move.'

Me: 'No I don’t. I was here first.'

EP: 'I SAID THIS IS OUR SPOT! THIS WHOLE STRETCH OF BEACH IS RESERVED FOR HOTEL GUESTS ONLY!'

Me, knowing that not a single hotel reserves spots or parts of the beach for guests: 'Ok, well go get someone from the hotel to move me. If you can find someone I’ll gladly move.'

EP: 'WELL THERE'S NO ONE WORKING RIGHT NOW YOU'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO BELIEVE ME!'

Me: 'There is literally miles of open beach. Pick a spot and enjoy your vacation.'

EP, both yelling at me and her family: 'THIS LADY HAS JUST RUINED OUR VACATION, WE NEED TO FIND A DIFFERENT SPOT!!'

So she and the rest of the family plop their stuff down literally 10 feet to the left of me, despite the entire beach still being open. For the next hour I pretend to be asleep listening to my audiobook but instead I’m listening to EP. Every word out of her mouth is how much of a witch I am, how it was so inconvenient that she had to carry her stuff an extra 10 feet, etc. I was overjoyed when the lifeguard kicked her and rest of the equally trashy adults in her group off the beach for refusing to put out their smokes."