“I was on this small cruise ship with my boyfriend. I’m also a dude, which is some important context. We drove three hours from home to make it to the check-in. That’s when The Witch and her Little Goblin entered in behind us. This wicked mother exclaimed at us, ‘Move over! My son and I NEED to check in right now!’ We moved aside and waited for her to be finished so we could actually checked in. We went aboard the ship and went looking for our cabin. It had a large bed, a large TV mounted on the wall, and a gorgeous view. We unpacked out luggage and began to settle in. When the announcement came that we would be departing, we went up to the adult zone, which was a section of the upper deck right next to the bar. Who do we see? Yup, Karen The Witch and her entitled little son, who could not have been older than nine and shouldn’t have been here. We start to take fun photos, recreating the Jack and Rose iconic pose from Titanic. All of a sudden, The Witch walked over to us and exclaimed, ‘You shouldn’t act like that here! My son is watching both of you! But I have to say, you did good, what a cute girlfriend!’
The Witch must have been talking about me. I was wearing this lace-up tartan asymmetrical dress, embracing my feminine side. She must not have known that I was a dude. We simply moved back inside. That evening, we made a reservation for the fancy restaurant on board. Since we had a reservation, we got to skip the massive line. Turns out The Witch was in this line with her son, and she didn’t like this at all. She exclaimed, ‘Why do they get to skip the line, while the rest of us have to stay behind?! Let me trade with you, my son is so hungry!’
I got tired of meeting her everywhere but hey, its a ship surrounded by water, we couldn’t avoid her for very long. We got our table, still hearing The Witch yelling at the workers. We ordered some drinks and food, and my boyfriend told me that he had something to ask me. He pushed his chair out so he could stand and eyed the waiter that came over with a little black box. I knew what was happening and started getting tears in my eyes. I had been waiting for some time for this to happen. He got on one knee and asked if I would make him the happiest man on earth. He barely finished the sentence when i said yes, I cant think of a life without him. Everyone started clapping and I gave him a long kiss. That was when The Witch finally got through the line and saw us kissing. She exclaimed suddenly, ‘Can’t you kiss your girlfriend somewhere else?! My son is with me!’
My boyfriend turned to her and spat out, ‘First of all, I just proposed! Second, that’s my boyfriend!’
You could see all the color disappear from The Witch’s face. She went on a homophobic tirade, while I noticed a putrid smell all of a sudden. I looked down, and The Witch’s child was by my leg, trying to pull down my skirt or something. I quickly grabbed his hands and yanked him away from me. That somehow set off The Witch even more! My boyfriend was furious. He normally never lays a hand on anyone, but had I not seen it and stopped him, he would have slapped her into the next century. The Witch was taken out, and we got our meal on the house. We then set out to find the bar. We heard there was live music and good drinks, so we had to try it out. We drank quite a bit and decided to dance as fiancees. Unfortunately, fate had something else in store for us. The Witch had found us, trying to get the bar to stop playing the music and trying to get us to leave. That’s when the bartender walked over, asking her to leave. The Witch protested, but the bartender told her, ‘First of all, you brought a child to a bar that specifically doesn’t allow them. Second, we do not tolerate homophobic abuse. Finally, you’re just a nasty person!’
You could almost hear her jaw drop to the floor as she looked for a response. She ended up leaving, the music kept on playing, and we gave an extra big tip before leaving to our cabin for some cozy time. The rest of our vacation went well, thankfully we didn’t encounter The Witch or her little goblin again! We’re getting married in a few months. Even when things hit the fan, you can always find happiness.”
