“I was working at a Wendy’s of all places, and this old man comes inside and orders some value sandwiches. He asks up pretty emphatically not to ‘press the juice out of them’. I assumed that he was referring to how grill chefs will push down on hamburgers with the spatula to make them sizzle, like you would have seen on television. I try to explain to the man that Wendy’s uses a double-sided closing grill, and that we don’t actually use spatulas while cooking the burgers. What he is requesting is impossible. He comments about how weird that it, and looking back on it, I should have just kept my mouth shut. I tell him, ‘Yeah, it’s weird, but it’s pretty common. I am pretty sure that McDonald’s does things that way too.’
He exclaimed suddenly, ‘Oh no, do NOT eat at McDonald’s!’
This elderly man proceeds to go on a rant for several long minutes about how McDonald’s puts soy into the chicken nuggets because of this influence from some rich family that he name-dropped. He went on and on about how the global elites are trying to depopulate the earth by sterilizing us with fast food. According to him, ‘All of that soy is what’s turning people gay, so they can’t reproduce!’
I saw a glorious opportunity for a come-back, so without missing a beat, I told him, ‘Oh! So I guess it’s too late for me then!’ with a wink. I watched the color drain from this man’s face. It was priceless. That moment was the single best experience I have ever had working in fast food. I remember that encounter so vividly.”